Preparing for the mental challenges of labor is just as important as preparing for the physical challenges. I would even argue that preparing mentally is MORE important than preparing physically.
Everyone always says that the mind gives up way earlier than the body does, and it is true!
So, here are some ways that you can prepare your mind for your upcoming birth.
Visualize Your Birth
I strongly believe in the power of manifestation. Yes, birth can be unpredictable, but there are a lot of things that are within your control!
A lot of times when I tell my clients to visualize their birth, I hear “I see myself not getting an epidural” or something like this.
While it is important to think about big decisions during your birth, what I am actually asking is to think about what your ideal birth looks like.
If you are giving birth in a hospital, what does the room look like? Maybe you might like to bring items from home that will make the space more comfortable, such as birth affirmation cards.
How do you see yourself communicating with the staff? Can you picture the nurses cheering you on?
If you are doing a home birth, are the lights dimmed? Are there essential oils diffusing in the background? Are you in the arms of your partner or are you more inward? Is there music playing and if so, what kind? Some moms put on birth affirmations, and others like to jam out to Beyoncé.
Picturing where you are and what you might be doing on the big day will help to prepare your mind for birth because it’ll be like you already thought out what to do and willed your visions to come true.
Rewire Your Thoughts About Labor
If this is your first birth, you may have some preconceived thoughts about how it all goes down.
Please note that with very few births look like the ones depicted in Hollywood. The births in movies are very dramatized, and the process is a little bit more drawn out than it looks.
This is why I recommend to my clients to take a birth course so that they familiarize themselves with the process of labor and aren’t blindsided by the potential twists and turns.
Stay Away From Negative Birth Stories
I am sure that your family and friends have told you all about their birth stories by this point in your pregnancy.
And while some of them may have been positive, it’s the negative ones that stick in your head.
There may be a few reasons why people share their negative birth stories. Maybe it is because they need validation on the traumatic events that have happened to them. Or, they may be thinking they’re doing you a favor by warning you about what’s to come.
Regardless of the intention, listening to negative birth stories will NOT help you with the mental challenges of labor.
One way that I practice protecting my mental space as I prepare for labor and delivery is if I am talking to someone and they start to go into their birth story, I politely step in and say “is this going to be a positive story? I am just trying to prepare mentally for labor, so I would like to keep it positive.”
If you do happen to hear a negative birth story, know that no two labors are exactly alike. So just because something traumatic happened to someone else does not mean that will happen for you.
Lean On Your Labor Partner
What does your support team look like?
This may be your spouse, a loved one, a doula, or all the above.
It may be beneficial for you to work through your concerns with them ahead of time and figure out ways that they can best support you when you are in labor.
Also, if you find yourself doubting your abilities or getting nervous, it can sometimes be nice to express those fears with someone you feel safe with.
Practice Birth Affirmations
There is tremendous power in positive birth affirmations.
I remember vividly during my birth thinking “there’s no way I can do this”. Then, when my doula arrived, I voiced those feelings out loud.
She grabbed me close and very gently said “what are you talking about? You’re already doing it. You’ve got this. Let’s take it one contraction at a time”
I swear from the moment she said that, something clicked in my head. The contractions didn’t ease in intensity, but I was able to manage them for the rest of my labor. From that point, they never got the better of me.
I share this story because THIS CAN HAPPEN FOR YOU! All it takes is a shift in the right direction.
Examples of Positive Birth Affirmations
Here are just some of my favorite examples of positive birth affirmations that you can practice ahead of time as you prepare your mind for birth. Feel free to take what serves you and leave the rest.
- You can do this for a minute. You can do anything for one minute.
- My baby is healthy and strong. He/she knows what to do and when it is time to be born.
- I have innate trust in my body. My body and baby know how to work together.
- I trust the process of birth. I am preparing my mind and body every day.
- I welcome each strong sensation during labor. Each contraction brings my baby closer to me.
- With each inward breath, I welcome power and calmness. With each outward breath, I release tension and fear.
- The sensations that I am feeling aren’t bigger than me. They are me. I am powerful.
- My labor is progressing because I soften and open easily. My pelvis and cervix make space for my birth to advance.
- I am safe and surrounded by a loving and supportive birth team.
- I see my new baby cuddled on my chest and that gives me the strength to keep going.
- I am connected to all the women giving birth right now. They can do it, and so can I.
Conclusion
Birth is not an easy process, and they don’t call it “laboring” for nothing.
It is so important to know how to prepare your mind for birth.
Yes, you should also prepare physically. But your mind will give up much faster than your body will. Therefore, it is necessary to train yourself mentally as well during your pregnancy before labor.
Further Research
If you’re interested in learning more about how to mentally and physically prepare for delivering a baby, you can check out this great post from North Texas Medical Center, linked here.
